Is there anyone who dislike being invited to wedding parties? It's the chance to enjoy a fancy meal at very reasonable price (depends on your gift budget), going to a dance party with free drinks throughout the night (I know some party that did this) and socialize with friends you've never met for a very long time.
I dislike parties. I'm one of those antisocial that groan when they receive a wedding invitation on their post box. I don't drink alcohol, I dislike dancing in public. This means that what I spend for the gift would be equal only to the free food; and I don't eat that much. Then there's the horrible thing about sitting on a table surrounded by people you might not really know or have long forgotten, having to choose either to be involved in awkward conversations or dine in silence; and the only thing that keeps me going to weddings, would be my effort to be the best of friends (which I seem to fail miserably ever so often, normally when selfishness, envy or laziness kicks in).
This, does not necessarily be the case with others. Most people that I know seem to enjoy going to parties, they stayed till late when I start pondering if it's okay to leave yet; probably because they're so much better at chit-chatting than me. This genuine enjoyment shared by so many people is the reason why not inviting someone considered as a friend to the party is considered rude and impolite.
In the attempt to contain every single person in my memory (which is not really that good), I found myself overflowed with names. With a big thanks to social websites, internet and emails system, I managed to filter most of the names. Still, many scuttled through the imperfect strainer and managed to somehow found me on the web and 'friend' me on the social website. Heck! How did they find out I'm getting married soon?? Due to this filtering system, I refrained myself from inviting some very new friends (those that I know for less than 6 months) or adding more people into my friends list in social websites. It might be wiser to do it later, after the wedding. Then, there's family friends.
My mother doesn't seem to be doing so well either, her friends list kept on growing. Teeming with close friends, friends and important people. But I know that her friendship with these people may be much closer than the friendship I shared with some other people that I'm about to invite. I know she's still talking with these people, chat with them, doing projects and all that stuff. So much that I feel rather guilty if I have to cut down her share of seats to sit my 'friends'.
So, what is friends? I have people that I have not meet for like 10 years plus (which somehow seemed rather excited about the chance of attending my party), and people that I haven't actually meet in person as I meet them only in internet forums in my list. There were also those that have hurt me in the past and was now doing all the friendly talk with me (which I tried to bear with). She has all the right to be invited to this party because I think she has played a major part in my life, be it an antagonist. There were male characters that have tried to change our friendship to romance and failed miserably and that I haven't seen for a few good years. Well, he deserves to be there as well. He has the right to know who I have chosen to stand in that place they failed to occupy. There were also, of course, an assorted list of friends that are close to me. Girls who giggled with me, hang out with me and spend pajama parties with. They definitely deserve the invite.
I seem to not mind those who brought me either negative or positive feelings. However, I'm not that keen on inviting those that are on the middle. Those that fail to excite in me any feelings at all. Well, I'm rather worried because I know that I am not that sensitive. I'm afraid that those who I don't consider as a friend, actually thinks of me as one. Now, that would be a horrible thing that would make me feel guilty for a very long time. This is pretty much the reason why I couldn't help but to put external filter on my invite list. It gives me a reason for not inviting someone. I could apologize later and the fact that I'd be fleeing the country after the wedding really helps. Some people may not be as lucky and are still struggling with their guest list.
Making a guest list is the hardest part in a wedding! Seriously!!
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